Pulling muscles and exposing weaknesses.

To say that my fitness journey has been rocky is a vast understatement. My goal of getting down under 200lbs has stalled, stopped, started, faultered, and sputtered more than it has actually delivered any results, and mainly because I haven’t been able to keep with it for more than a week to ten days at a time.

I was moving along at a fair pace during winter, until I caught Covid during March break. And since I’ve had EBV fairly recently, like late 2015, I wasn’t in a rush to have SARS2 kickstart that virus back up again, nor risk any Long Covid symptoms so I gave myself twelve weeks less a day before I picked up my weights, and actually got physically active again. Then we got into summer and our travel plans and I did not ship my weights, nor my bike along with us. And now I’m home, heading into the fall, and I have done only a day or two of exercise in the last month or more. I tried pull ups in the park the other day, and did a horizontal zip line type thing, and the muscles through my chest and abdomin are screaming bloody murder at me. So no sit ups just yet. No body weight hangs either!

I do fantasize about doing a proper free weights regimen, or getting into cycling, or Crossfit again, but ultimately I want to lose weight, get into better shape, but not spend much money at all to do so. So much like my writing, I need to convert action into habits, and fit it into my every day without fanfare or bluster. I know I will NEVER wake up early just to exercise, but I would stay awake 10-15 minutes more to fit in a quick jumble through some minor movements, provided I don’t make myself all sweaty after having showered for bed already.

Whatever – point is, my physical fitness is lacking, my discipline and motivation to get in and do anything is an uneven ebb and flow. I need to change it from an event to a habit, and that requires a mental shift I haven’t been able to replicate since 615 days ago when I started writing every day. And in most cases my blog post is more like an uneventful journal entry, and not the short stories, or long form writing I had intended it to be. Still going though! So that’s something.

My weight is hovering around 203-206lbs, and my goal is to reach 185lbs, and then possibly continue to 175lbs, and then remain close to that goal weight. Heavy enough to remain substantial, but not heavy enough to really harm my joints, knees, hips, ankles etc… take some pressure off of my abdomin, try to reduce my snoring too. Do my best to reduce all these new jiggly bits. Size down the stomach an inch or two so that my pants fit more comfortably. I don’t need to go back to a size 30 waist, but to be comfortable in 32’s would be beneficial for my wardrobe. That would open back up all the nicer menswear I had to put away as I got heavier. My dress shirts would all become wearable, same with my suits, sport coats, and jackets. All my medium t-shirts could come out of retirement too. Oh to dream. Ha. But I need to do it though. Wishing and wanting don’t seem to get me more than a day or two in. Going to HAVE to do things. Eat smaller portions, and be more active. Walk more. Squats, push ups, sit ups, lunges, burpees, running, cycling, swimming, lifting weights, stretching. Some, all, or a combination of the above. Consistently. For weeks and months on end.

Don’t worry, I won’t leave you hanging. I will be sure to report in regarding how things progress, or not. It’s a shame Fitbit’s are so pricey, a cheap step counter might be my best Avenue in. I like seeing a visual goal, and then reaching or exceeding something that I can see might work in my favour. Doubtful. Just an excuse to spend money. Though, I bet I can find my wife’s old first gen fitbit somewhere. Hmm.

What’s so special about Day 121?

Nothing really. Still madly working away on projects for my day job. Built a bench out of scrap pressure treated lumber for our orchard down at the farm. And have been working on house hold things like laundry, dishes and bathroom cleaning, you know fun stuff.

Today also marks 14 days of lifting weights again. Not much change due to starting light in weight, but I think because I changed my mindset about 121 days ago, in regards to finding the time to do things that are important to me, I’ve found it easier to stick with the exercise because that reward pathway is built in my head now. It doesn’t have to be much, as long as I do something physical every day. I don’t even put a time expectation on it for duration. Just do anything, everyday. Eventually I’ll discover a rythm or a regimen that works. But I’m not at that point, I’m just trying to do it, at all, every day. Bicep curls, tricep curls, rowing, chin lifts, kettle bell swings, Turkish get ups, shoulder press, arm raised, shoulder shrugs, bench press with a make shift bench, chest press, squats, lunges. If it can be done with two or fewer dumbbells I’ll try it to see if it works for me, without hurting myself. Do I aim to run marathons or run an iron man triathlon, nope. I just want to feel a bit better, and possibly fit into some nice pants in the future. I’d like to be able to lean over to tie my shoes without my belly impeding my way. But weight loss isn’t my concern right now. Just building the mentality to do it every single day. Legs, arms, back, belly. I don’t care which. It takes time, and a small effort, but I’m happy to have started. Much like writing, I’ll see how long I go for, no pressure.

Tackled two jobs yesterday that I had been fixing piecemeal for multiple years, and the shabby nature of the file, and compounding small fixes finally caught up with me. Had to invest multiple hours into rebuilding them from scratch. It’s better now that it’s done in this manner, but boy did it give me trouble. The project started out with minor changes, then a few more, then several more, and then a total redo. But due to the nature of the first changes, it wasn’t worthy of a rebuild. But mission creep, and the totality of the changes over the years warranted it now. Plus it was giving the printers grief, and made me look bad in the process. So I bit the bullet and fixed every single facet in a single day, and hopefully now it’ll be perfect moving forward. And I don’t hear about it until next year when products get added or dropped, and distributors change their contact info, or logos get updated etc etc…

So that’s my Thursday. I’m waiting on two more parts of my large report and then I can send it off for proofing all of the data / tables and graphs/charts. Then I can make any edits and submit it to the clients. Then it is time for the invoicing! Getting paid – ya!