Planning with mind games.

A good chunk of my process for writing creative short stories is day dreaming as much of the story before hand prior to writing it all down. The more time I spend lurking around in a coherent story the better the written work tends to be, or at least I tend to veer off on strange tangents a lot less. However finding the time to ruminate in my own head uninterrupted is increasingly difficult. More over once I carve out the time to do so I am more often than not drawing a blank on how to progress the story line. I know the broad strokes of where I want to go, and roughly how to get there, but I am unable to imagine it, to walk around in it, to inhabit it. Most likely two years of stress and anxiety about Covid is tamping down the creative side of me. My kids are now older and require a different amount, and different kinds of attention than they did in 2020.

One thing I can do to help calm myself or juice up my creativity is find photos that have an interesting play of light in them. I like striking contrast and orange late evening or morning light. It’s short and fleeting but makes a statement. Something like this:

30 days straight of writing

And what have I learned? That my vocabulary is stunted at best when i’m commiting thoughts to paper while writing in the moment. I have to rewrite entire sentences and sometimes paragraphs because that epic word on the tip of my tongue can’t be found and the flow is off without that very specific turn of phrase. Only to later come up with it and have to back track and edit that section a third time. Also the thought of having to slog through an action / dialogue/ detail heavy portion of my story will stop me clean in my tracks and I will put the writing off until later in the day, or settle for a silly inane blog post with a photo instead.

Book two is closing in on 10,000 words so I am thankful for that. I do worry that I am retreading too much old ground, or that I aim to throw in plot twists or subvert tropes for the general sake of doing so. I do believe that 2020 was a very depressing and isolating year, and as such my writing had more gravitas behind it. Feels like I’m chasing a feeling rather than excising something deep from within. In all honesty it took me such a long time to find a suitable thread to follow for the second portion of short stories in my overarching series that I think I might just be nervous it’s not as exciting or as enjoyable as the first book.

Something else that I have had to relearn is that writing about anything is just as good as writing continually about one specific train of thought. Adding in some one shot funny bits is rather cathartic when the idea around a four thousand word chapter seems too daunting a task.

Sirens have begun to blare in the common spaces of the dormitory…

And all other common spaces aboard the UB313 dark site base. Strobing orange and blue lights spin with reckless abandon upon every flat surface alerting everyone to the mission at hand. The blisteringly cold air inside the base has a crisp tension to it now. The taught faces on everyone who passes along the gangways and in the halls makes the fear and excitement most palpable.

The away teams Eta & Theta have scrambled to their muster stations, and are reading their data packets in preparation for their impending departure. No direct route, just an order to get out to Lagrange point five out beyond Pluto / Charon and await further instructions there. The away teams are running at one third man power, and they have orders to add in the lost crew members weight in additional fuel cells or hard uranium pellets.

Looks as though the rosters were drawn at random within each team, as the crew compliments differ between Eta & Theta. One team appears to be all command, and the other all various types of grunts. No idea if the point is to work in tandem or to be isolated in obtaining the asset – whatever it is.

Muffled shouts and clanking of boots and machine parts on the rough metal grates makes it hard to think. Their are service vehicles and lift trucks going about their business as usual, and the machine shop people are busy retrofitting anything they can get their hands on. The screech and rattle of unbalanced loads in the lathes and cnc’s is nearly deafening. The light in here is dim, and the smell of acrid smoke and burning lubricants permeates the air. Air quality on UB313 is usually shit at the best of time, add propane engines, and burnt lubricants to that, and a million other solvents and you have the quality toxic cloud of air that we call home. Hanging down from the rough hewn rock ceilings are the under powered exhaust vents, miles of pipes and cables all tied together and mounted off of swinging all too thin chains. It really looks like a last ditch attempt to make the best of a bad situation. You’d be hard pressed to know this base has been operational for several hundred standard years. The hard worn and battered baffles that are up on ceiling swing wildly under the chaotic air currents and draughts.

The closely knit teams are already communicating with hand signals or on our closed circuit sub-vocal channels. Sounds like we stand to make a pretty good chunk of cash if we pull this daring heist off successfully. Will be left to rot in the surgical bay at the hands of the beast should we fail. The check lists for deployment are hours long and deeply intricate. Call from upstairs says be ready to drop in six hours time. So much to do, so little time.

All around the drop ships, the ground crews are scrambling to check off multiple items at a time. Oil slicked hands drop nuts to instrumental bolts, and sweat pours profusely from every pore. The stink of old breath and sweat mixed with oils, grease and desperation are an unwelcome but well known element to a dark ops deployment this far away from civilization. When you work to destabilize, steal and corrupt everything around you, the smell of fear is always nestled in your nose, and resting upon the back of your tongue so you can taste its fetid presence.

Part six: Ghost of the Dirty Starling.

This is not sustainable.

As much as we struggle with trying to keep a junior kindergartener on line for six hours a day, and a grade two student engaged and excited to learn, the thought of sending them back to school in person is keeping me up at night. On the plus side in another thirteen days my grade two will have developed her second dose immunity and could potentially go back – maybe. But we’ll be into July before my youngest can even have one dose, and mid August for her second, so I don’t know what to do about her. Sending her back to these unprotected, unguarded schools in total disarray seems more like a punishment than a service at this point. Yes she can be trying at times, aggravates me to no end, but I do not wish her dead, nor so severely ill as the affect her entire future. Seems like those of us with unvaccinated kindergartners (not for lack of trying or desire for it) will need to keep them separated from their friends until they turn five or the government health ministers lower the age for juvenile COVID-19 vaccinations.

However, I think that the return will be short lived as classes close down, or condense together and education stops or gets repeatedly interrupted and the whole lot just becomes a day camp of bored, sick disaffected youths bundled together watching friends and family get sick. Not a real high point for “mental health” champions. I don’t know about you but being lonely at home is preferable to watching my friends potentially getting so sick they die or are permanently injured in one way or another.

And where the fuck are all of the other party leaders here, surely 22 months in a coalition could have been formed to pressure the party of Doug Ford to actually put in place safety measures that count, or to spend the money they’ve been given by the federal government. Billions unspent, billions misplaced, disappearing ministers and a no show premiere. Doing Ontario proud there boys and girls.

No ambulances in some areas for anything what so ever. Reports of fire fighters calling taxis and Uber ride shares to send car accident victims to over crowded hospitals. What a fucking mess. I bet this tracks well with fans of his.

“And you’ve had a job before this one correct?”

“Yes, that’s true I worked at an aquatic zoo”.                                                                    “Is that like an aquarium?”                         “Oh, you know that term, I assumed that was just insider corporate jargon.”                              “No, no – that’s a fairly common term for water based fish conservation.”        “Hmmm. I respectfully disagree.”         “Well, can you tell me what lessons you learned working at the aquarium.”     “There you go, throwing that corporate jargon in my face. The fish zoo I worked at had several kinds of penguins and bottle nosed dolphins.”  “Ok,  do go on please.”  “Sure thing. Ah – the first piece of information is that penguins can be vicious. And dolphins like to engage in rape.”  “COUGH! – Goodness I wasn’t aware of that. How did you learn those things and what actions did you take because of it?”  “Yeah, ok, right. Well, what can I say – penguins can’t take a punch. And I don’t recommend retaliating against a dolphin by raping it with said stunned penguin. That’s for sure. No sir.”  “Wait – were, were you raped by a dolphin?” “To be fair… what do you know about lady dolphin vaginal secretions?” “Good lord , nothing. I don’t know anything about female dolphin vaginas.” “Count yourself lucky then doll. That shits like Valhalla. Only way there is to die in battle!” “What does dying have to do with dolphin vaginal secretions, vicious penguins and rape?” “Well skinny dipping in the tank and taking a dolphin dong in the bum will ruin your hole weak if you let it. Taking a short cut through the penguin exhibit nude is also not suggested.” “Jesus H Christ.” “Welp, the little bastards jumped up and bit me, so I punched it in the head. And even unconscious it was rigid which gim’me an idea, so I trekked back to the dolphin tank for a wrestle and to settle my score. You’d be amazed at how helpful an octopus can be when…” “Oh my, well I’m sorry to say that it has just come to my attention that the current supervisory position here at Little Tykes Nursery School has been filled. Good day to you sir.”

Running around today.

Got to get one of the kids to their vaccination appointment this morning, and the other needs to be monitored all day to make sure they stay online for kindergarten class. Have out of home errands to run, so if I do write anything of note today it’ll be later on in the afternoon or evening. But here I’ll leave you with a picture of something!

A pumpkin boat! Whaaaaah!?!

“Oh here they come…

“Let’s get Alex to tell us about their dinner date!” Chuckles the two mismatched orderlies dressed in midnight blue scrubs. Their lopsided grins are pulled tight with mirth. They both begin to wave excitedly trying to gain Alex’s attention in the hustle and bustle of the mess hall lunch rush. “Hey Al over here!, come over here and sit with us.” Bellows the larger of the two orderlies. His tanned olive skin and close cropped jet black hair stands out against the piercing grey eyes. “Come on Al, Giada wants to hear all about your dinner date with that special guy!”. A round of chuckles breaks out around the large table where a mass of other random orderlies are gathered on their break. Shuffling over towards the table, the six foot six nurse technician mumbles sheepishly. “It wasn’t a date, I just said I caught one having dinner here like a month ago. It – wasn’t – a – date. I just wanted to say hello, I’d always thought they were a myth”. Alex talks into their chest, chin pointed down, eyes hidden behind the long lank hair of their bangs. “Yeah, Alex here says they met a Half-Three, a full on ship board ghost crew member! Ha. Right!”. Barks the smaller of the two orderlies. A silver haired wisp of a man. He’s turning left and right in his seat looking up and down the table gesticulating and jittering with fits of laughter. “It wasn’t really much of anything. I saw Mark, the ghost take out this voucher I’d never seen before and sit down with a full on prime rib dinner, with garlic Onion and chive mashed potatoes and grilled asparagus on the side, layered in a thick rich brown gravy that had the slighted tinge of rainbow on top from natural oils. It smelled amazing”. Talking about the meal brings Alex’s voice into full volume over the laughs and giggles of the gathered crowd of orderlies. An older doctor a few seats down the table jolts at the mention of the gravy. “What are you talking about, oil slicks on gravy. That’s nonsense. Do you know how much it would cost to have real animal flesh kept on board. Ridiculous! Utter nonsense. you guys told me this would be a laugh, but now I’m just annoyed and irritated!” Throwing down her knife and fork, the doctor pulls her napkin from their lap, and throws it onto their plate with a flourish. “No – no! It’s true, I saw the voucher before he put it into the central dispenser. It was an eggshell blue voucher.” “That tells me nothing I don’t all ready know. They come in all kinds of colours. Don’t lie to me Alex. I can pull you from rotation and bust you down to cleaning bed pans for the next decade.” The older doctor is red in the face with a large purple vein pulsating on her temple. “I saw the priority symbol that was in iridescent violet ink!” Rasped Alex in retort. “What symbol? What are you talking about?” “On the right side of the voucher was a strange symbol I’d never seen before. It was all in outlines but hard to forgot. It almost looked alien.” The gathered crowd had fallen quiet once the older doctor’s attention became rapt. “An iridescent violet symbol. No way, listen I make close to the top pay grade onboard this ship. I’ve seen all kinds of meal vouchers, even those given to visiting dignitaries and the Orange Caste. That’s not a thing. You’re so full of shit Alex”. Exclaims the irate doctor in a huff. “I can draw it for you! it looks like this – a square with a circle and triangle inside it, that connects with the squares four walls. Down the center bisecting the circle is a line that extends out from the edge of the square by about a third of the squares size. An upside down U is centered over the line, and it terminates in a semi circle with like triangles encased in the bowl of the C. Here scan this image, and do a search on your wrist pad”. Handing over a slip of paper with the symbol on it, the doctor picks it up off of the table, and holds it to her wrist communicator. With a chirp and a beep it scans the image and begins to search. Within seconds a prompt to put in the doctors ‘Q Level’ security clearance appears, which she does with a sense of slight trepidation. A few moments pass and a single item returns. It is an image with a caption underneath. “Yeah that’s it, that’s it! Come on Dr. Jorek enlarge it, stream to the table top for everyone to see”. Yips the large nurse Alex in excitement. Pausing for a breath, Dr. Jorek toggles a switch on the top of her wrist communicator projecting the image upon the flat table top surface. The smooth white Formica like substrate works excellently as an impromptu view screen. Gasps are heard around the table. “Would you look at that!” “Sweet Jesus!” “Holy – fucking – shit!” “I told you guys!” sneers Alex in a triumphant tone. “That meal voucher was for a hundred thousand dollars. Your pal just had a single meal worth more than the average salary of ninety percent of our onboard crew. Jesus. There’s no way this guys only does maintenance or fills job gaps.” A few seconds later all the medical personnel at the table feel vibrations on their wrist communicators. A simultaneous notification has gone out to the localized group.

**PRIORITY MESSAGE** Ref Code Upsilon_#00791-002-4946 UNAUTHORIZED ACCESS TO INTERNAL IMAGE DATABASE – BREACH DETECTED – Please stay where you are a tactical team has been dispatched to your location with orders to subdue with prejudice. keep your hands flat on the table, fingers splayed open, and feet firmly planted on the ground.

The air inside the mess halls feels like it has been sucked out of the room. The large table is now sitting, stunned in total silence. The drop in ambient noise is so palpable that other tables in the huge mess hall are falling silent and are craning their necks to turn and stare. A muffled sound can be heard from outside the mess hall, it’s the sound of heavy boots hitting the floor grating in unison. The jingle of tactical gear can be heard as guns and rifles are drawn. The faces of the crowd as ashen. The lights in the room are cut.

Part Five: Ghost of the Dirty Starling.

School is on – again.

Kids are back to online elearning for this week, so I can’t promise that I will add as many or any full installments to the ghost of the dirty starling this week. I did write close to five thousand words for it last week with four chapters and a side-note anecdotal addendum that goes into a little more detail about one aspect. I’m trying to flesh out how to tie several storylines together without ballooning into a 100,000 word novel. I want to be concise wherever possible and skip over anything repetitive or boring. I don’t mind exposition, but I’d rather leave more to the imagination to bridge gaps than write all of the inbetween events. They did start as micro shorts of about 400-500 words, so the few that get into 1,500 to 3,500 should be the exception rather than the norm. Guess I’ll break out the construction paper to build a road map to pull the strings together soon.

“Excuse me Dr.Jang but you’re being paged on a private channel…

By Jones on the secure line. The encryption pattern this shift is Omega, sir.” Just as quickly as the intern appeared as a floating head at my office door she is gone, leaving only the baleful blue light shining in from the hall. The office is rather grand as far as black ops sites go out on the far reaches of human space. UB313 is located out in the grim darkness beyond Pluto, and as such doesn’t warrant much attention from The Companies associated with earth’s greater goings on. Decorated with framed photos guilded in gold, hand drawn ancient maps, technical drawings of stations and memorabilia stolen by the earth side insurgencies they help to fund and direct from afar. Corporate espionage and technological breakthroughs in R&D are the main focus in the bored out depths of UB313. They are as unscrupulous a bunch as you will ever find. They attract the vile, the scum and villainy like maggots to day old roadkill on a piping hot asphalt road in late July.

The walk from the grand office down the tight bare hewn rock walls of the hallway is a fair jaunt. The high grade low wattage blue leds strung up over the kilometers of dark grey black rock make everything here look the same. Signage is at a bare minimum here, due to the elicit nature of much of their work. Also – the torture element. Dr. Jang has a penchant for unnecessary surgery and has used it to mine for answers among those his insurgents have managed to capture and return to him alive enough to question. Lost in thought, but still counting off his turns and stairs along the route the taught, rigid doctor saunters into the bridge without knocking to stride over to the private channel comm’s terminal located in an alcove off of the side of the main bridge. A red blinking light flashes repeatedly beside a blood red hand held phone receiver. With a quick flick of the wrist Dr. Jang picks up the receiver and places it next to his ear. “Took you long enough – I have word from our network that somebody has triggered a sword initiative, rated at level orange. You know what that means good doctor. We need to locate and capture the target before the earth side corporation’s can get out there to find it. Dispatch a small team now, before we’ve even traced the signal. We have a nine week travel lead on The Company people. Use it and bring me that specimen!” – CLICK. The other end of the line has gone dead. The raspy voice of the one we call Jones was tight with excitement, also insistent on an urgent response. Well it isn’t beyond the good doctor to act rashly before having a fully developed plan. Slowly a menacing grin blooms across his taught features like an ink stain on wet paper. Turning quickly on his heels to glide across the room and out of the private alcove Dr. Jang leans over a smaller terminal to toggle the base wide PA system. “We have an Omega level sword initiative triggered – code level orange. I need an immediate dispatch of search teams ETA & THETA. Head to the Charon Pluto lagrange point 5 – add the offset in crew as additional fuel since your orbit will be unstable. Hang there until we can get you a more precise set of coordinates. Dr. Jang out.” Looking around the room at the shocked and excited faces of the bridge crew Jang knows it is going to be a busy and fretful couple of weeks while they work to pick up the requested target. “Sir?. We have some rough data going in on the teletype machine – looks a little disrupted though. It could have been corrupted passing one of the signal repeaters. But we can test for that against our back log of recieved communications- sir.” “Good, good. If you need me I’ll be back in my surgical bay. I have a few questions I need answers to. Please do have your interns buzz before they enter this time.” The look on the comm’s ensigns face drains of any appreciable colour. “Yes! Sir – yes, yes sir of course, sir.” A single bead of sweat dribbles down the side of his face even though the UB313 base would be considered rather chilly at the best of times.

Part Four: Ghost of the Dirty Starling..

Here’s a useful quick tip.

If you ever write a micro-short story that begins to spiral outwards into a multi chapter series of interconnected tales, that feel like pin points of light on a black blanket that eventually lays out a beautiful mosaic like final image; keep track of all of your character names, occupations, gender (if required) Race (if not human) and the names of the places that they inhabit, the ships / stations / vessel names and their approximate locations as you go along. Up until recently I thought I had a good chunk of it down pat, but then I couldn’t recall if I had used yellow as a colour code before, and it turns out I was using it for HR / and personnel related things. So I have gone back through 75,000+ words of interconnected short stories to retrace the steps of all of my characters, their whereabouts, and the proper spelling of vessel names, and their classifications. Funny how a handful of non-fiction micro shorts of 500 words of less, became an increasingly large in scale, scope and size science-fiction world of short stories, circling a semi coherent central narrative – via the use of multiple points of view, and sometimes contradictory accounts from characters with their own axes to grind. Also, quick tidbit – if you create made up names for in world technology; write that shit down.

To anyone who has read any of my short fiction, thank you! I know it’s not terribly polished, as I tend to publish as I go along. When I have an idea I want it out of my head as fast as possible, and I’m not shy about editing several days or weeks later. But the gist of the story stays the same regardless of catching a spelling or grammatical error after the fact. Keep on grinding it out, and make yourselves feel better.