The secret to my scrambled eggs.

No real set of instructions to follow, but you will need: six (6) eggs, salt & pepper, milk (poured in to suit) a whisk or fork to mix, and either a bowl or pourable container with a spout. Also important, a stove top and a shallow sauce pan, or a frying pan. One flat edges spatula or your favourite design.

Glop all of the eggs, a few shakes of salt & pepper, and somewhere in the vicinity of 3/4 of a cup of milk. Mush all that together with a whisk or fork for about a minute. At least until all the yolks have ruptured. Turn your stove top burner to a medium /medium low heat. Let it warm up as you work your ingredients together. (Might want to read through before starting, my had). Pour all contents into the now heated pan on the stove. In a constant movement, scrape off the bottom of the pan to reveal the newly congealed scrambled eggs. Keep going until all of the liquid eggs have become a solid. At this point you can start to flip the mass over in chunks. Then using your spatulas edge cut the mass into many, many smaller pieces. Turn off the heat, and it is at this point you could add a cheese to the top, or go and make some toast to go with it. Scoop up with a spatula and enjoy. The whole process can take about ten (10) minutes, if you start off with a not blazing hot pan. A slow heat will yield softer fluffier eggs, and not a rubbery overcooked mess. Slow and steady. No burned patches, no charring, and every bite is edible. Good if you’re on a budget and can’t afford to let any go due to waste/mishap.

Today is Thursday July 28th, of the year 2022.

Another busy day on the books.

Dialing in on the final product with a couple of clients this week, which makes me feel good. It’s always nice when a project comes together in the end and everyone is satisfied with the outcome. I am expecting final fixes/edits for a report at some point this week, so I’ll be happy to scratch one more item off the to-do list. Perhaps another report will surface in the next two weeks or so. Not certain, but it’s possible.

We hosted a couple of cousins (outdoors of course) for some swimming, trampolining and lunch. A slight miscalculation lead to a second party being invited on the same day, but seeing as we were cooking for so many already, and the yard is spacious, what’s an extra five into the mix. All bar one is vaccinated, and that particular individuals family had Covid two or three weeks ago, and have been on the mend for ten days or more (or so I was told). No fights, no bloody wounds, so all around a good visit with friends and family. I’ll take it as a win.

The kids are on day two of their outdoor swimming lessons. I’m not sure how much a three week course can do for them, but they soak up stuff they enjoy like sponges, so maybe getting both kids to swim using their arms and legs simultaneously will be worth it in the end. The youngest is more confidence than skill at this point. So any help from a swim instructor will be greatly appreciated. If it’s not me teaching them, or my wife, the kids will actually listen and follow along. It gets to be like pulling teeth with them if I’m the one leading the instructions. Gladly pay a certified specialist to get them water safe around the pool or the lake.

Heading into the last days of week four. Five left to go, and the temperatures are set to go up! Going to need to think about the state of their back packs, pencil cases, consumable stock piles of paper, erasers and pencil crayons & crayons. Look at sizing indoor and outdoor shoes. Do coats and hats still fit. Sort out all the ruined school clothes from the still viable pieces. Late August, and very early September will see a flurry of activity regarding the children. Of course my wife will be back at work before August is through, so that will fall to me. I have the kids in a dance, music, acting camp the last week, so I can tackle that stuff unimpeded. I’ll get through it a whole lot quicker if left alone to tackle it with music playing as i work.

Early September will see me ramping up my house cleaning. Cabinets doors, walls, baseboards, waxing & polishing the floors, after sweeping and vacuuming thoroughly with ever chair up turned and off the floor. Moving the couch and tables to get every last scrap of crud off the floors. Windows will get washed inside and out. Laundry piled as tall as I am in preparation for the first day of school. All the new clothes will have to get washed and sorted. Closets upturned and decluttered. The toy box actually used to store toys that I don’t throw away or ship off to the cottage.

Once all that is done, then the leaves will begin to fall and the lawn, exterior will be an area of concern. Plus I’d like to go buy some hardwood lumber and make a few more furniture projects before winter hits and the shop becomes too cold to use. That’s getting months ahead of myself. Best enjoy the sunshine and family time now, as it really is so fleeting. Getting darker earlier and earlier the further into summer we get!

“Why do all of these hallways…

Smell like shit? I had never noticed it before, but now every one we get called out to stinks like hell.” Moans the slight framed man with a wispy beard. “Probably due to all the piss and vomit, would be my informed guess there Garreth.” Replies the short heavy set woman with cropped grey hair. “That and the dead bodies.” She chimes in a second later. “Yeah – the dead bodies would most likely be the culprit for the stench.” Chuckles Garreth, his weak shoulders jumping as he laughs. “So how the fuck do we keep finding these bodies after they’ve been dead for so long?” Garreth whines as the two officers walk deeper into the dilapidated tenement building, wandering the labyrinthine halls lit by flashing yellowing bulbs. Everywhere you look is cracked dry wall, mould patches, and peeling paint. Ceiling tiles with greasy brown water stains, and puddles of urine gathered at the edges of the red well worn carpets. “Well Garreth, in these instances most of the neighbours are junkies, extremely poor, or illegals. Nobody wants us here, they want as little local law enforcement scrutiny as possible. So shit goes from bad to worse, until they can’t stand it. And we turn up, bother people by asking questions which nobody will answer, and then cart off the rotting corpse. Rinse and repeat. Feel me wee man?” The large woman croaks through gritted teeth. “How many does this make for us Garreth?” The female officer asks as they get within visual range of the slumped body. Previously laying on the floor where it meets the wall. Turned inwards to face the baseboard. From the angle they are standing at they can’t tell if it’s a man or a woman. There is a definite unusual twist to the torso, like it had tried to scratch an itch went too far and died after snapping it’s own spine in twain. Various fluids and puddles seep out from under the grayish blue body. The smell is thick in the air. A humid and pungent overly rotten orange twinge to the air. “At last count we were up to six this week. Not counting the four last week left in a similar state.” Garreth replies quietly. “Looks like the last apartment on this floor. Shouldn’t this hallway have a window or fire exit or something?” Garreth asks as he kneels down to poke around the body with one latex glove on, and a thin metallic rod he uses to lift a collar here, and a jacket pocket flap there. “I’d be surprised if any of the rooms had more than a port hole sized window per unit. These bastard builders cram as many bodies into these apartments as they can. What a shit hole.” Grumbles the larger officer turning away from Garreth while he conducts his first pass over the prone body. “Something tells me we won’t find a listing for this victim in this apartment block. Not sure why, just a vibe I’m getting.” She offers offhandedly. “Whatever you say boss lady. I don’t see any Id on the vic, and the coroner’s folks will get here soon. We can get some fresh air and wait for the retinal scan from doc’s people.” Garreth answers standing up while peeling off his lone glove by the heel of his palm. “Want me to go grab us a bite?” He offers. “Yes. We passed a Longo’s on the way in here, grab me a partial rotisserie chicken.” “No problem Priss, what you eat for breakfast is no business of mine.” He chuckles as he walks back out of the dim pungent hallway.

224 Ways to Lose Your Virility. And They All Involve Scissors.

Tough crowd out there today. Early morning chill in the air, and all that jazz. Summer hits real different when the thunderstorms suck out all of the humidity. Got us all searching for sweaters and long pants as we sit in the shade with a cross breeze. You think you’ll never be cool again when the heat waves roll in, but once they move on, you start thinking about “This feels like the fall and October” – again. Very strange.

Spent a good chunk of yesterday (when not at my desk working) pulling thistles from the lawn. I hate thistles so, so much. Stabbed in the fingers and palms over, and over again. Usually if you pull a scotch thistle out just above the root, where it meets the ground you can avoid the worst of the prickly bits. But the midsized ones haven’t softened at the base yet, and shredded my gloved palms. I need to find a manufacturer that builds really tough gloves. Nothing I own can truly deal with either a thistle or a rose bush. It’s really very irritating.

Now you may ask yourself, why do the titles of these posts have so little to do with the actual content? And I’d say, I’m merely staying on trend with National newspapers, who post inflammatory head lines that are misleading vs. What was written. So I take the next logical step and write odd titles, and then fill it with stream of consciousness blathering. Fun stuff huh? Yeah. Yeah it is. Take that money to the bank. A cool 6 cents worth of advertising dollars! Look at me rolling in the views & exposure!

What a storm we had last night.

For most a Sunday evening is full of trepidation and concern for the work week ahead, but for us it was overwhelmed by a massive thunder storm with lightning that was close enough to be nearly instantaneous with the booming thunder clap. Very exciting. No tornado that we know of anyway. Which is good. The humidity was sapped which is fantastic. At least for the moment. A real fresh start for a Monday. Lovely.

Let us see if this work week is as busy as last week, and the week before that. Either way, with the break in the weather for this week, might as well get out and about with the family to enjoy the summer while it’s not a complete scorcher. A day here or an afternoon there where it’s hot is great, but bot for multiple weeks on end that have increased year over year.

You gotta write that stuff down, my bother.

Most evenings I think of a really funny title or topic to write about, and by the morning it’s completely erased from my memory. I think to myself, oh this is so good, I can’t possibly forget. Then I promptly forget after I fall asleep. What an idiot!

So you’re stuck with whatever else pops into my head the day of. It’s not to say I won’t spontaneously remember at some point in the day, of course I do. But it becomes a matter of whether I now feel it worth to write down after already having posted something else. You can see the bind that puts me in. My hands are tied, really. It’s company policy, nothing I can do. (No, on all three counts, but still. I don’t wanna!)

Took the kids for a late evening swim, which continues to get a little earlier than the day before. I can’t believe we are only a week away from August. Where does the time go? Well, besides sleeping, working & the family that’s all the time we had today kids. Come back next time, remember to hold on to your ticket stubs and receipts and we can validate your parking for you.

Lazy Sunday today. And I’m feeling the delayed onset of muscle soreness (doms) from a couple big work outs, and weeding the pumpking patch in the intense heat. My calves and hamstrings are singing today, believe you me. The thing is squatting in the sun to pull weeds leaves me more sore than lifting the weights I have at home. I’d like to go buy a few more heavier dumbbells, but they’re not cheap. Even at Walmart, that shit’s expensive. I guess it’s more of an investment in myself/health, but $100 or so per dumbbell is a bit rich for my blood. At least until those invoices start creeping in with cheques attached. But to be honest, I’m more interested in buying hardwood in September than I am buying free weights.

The furniture building bug is still with me. I’d like to build a quality bookshelf/cabinet for my office, so I can display some items I’ve had in storage for about a decade or more. Free up some closet space at the same time. I want to make a slab coffee table too, but my attentions and needs have shifted a bit recently. Once the kids are a bit older a larger wall unit for storage will need to be built around the fireplace in the living room. Gotta get some quality hand made projects under my belt before I tackle something with that much exposure.

In defense of the indefensible: By placing the blame on you, and playing the victim. Or not. I don’t know.

Had a bout of insomnia last night thinking about the execution of a print ad I’m currently working on. I think we’ve nailed down the concept, and I’m creeping up on the execution. We’re going to get there, of that I’m certain, but it will take another hour or two of dedicated focus on contact shadows, spilled ambient light, and reflections to achieve. So expensive, is what I’m saying in a round about way. I started off with a functionally easy execution that was cost effective, and a new more intricate design was requested, so now it’s on! Invoices out means money coming in.

I’ve never enjoyed dreaming about work, that usually means I’m stressed out, but it actually gave me a good idea on how to fix my problem, so begrudgingly I will accept this small offer of subconscious help. Not that I want much more of it. Woke up with a sore jaw, so I know I was grinding my teeth from stress. Good times. I had to wear an acrylic bridge for years because I was doing that constantly in my teens. What an awful appliance that was to have cemented in. Cracked a fair number of my molars when removing it too.

Three weeks into summer break.

We are all still alive and well. Three down, six to go. This minor heat wave is making outdoor time a bit stressful. Not do much fun playing the farmer wannabe when the temperature goes way up. Had dome minor rain last night here, along with thunder & lightning. Not much though, as it didn’t last long. Ground was very dry when I woke up, so that’s not an ideal sign of much precipitation.

The TelMax people have begun to drill in order to run fiber optic cable in our whole town, so those Vermeer drilling rigs are all over the place along with huge reels of orange and blue fiber optic lines. The vacuum trucks are y far the loudest aspect of the operation so far. According to the spray paint, flags and guide holes, we should end up with four new holes on the front lawn, to match all of the streets water shut offs, and gas main shut offs, road signs and lamp posts that we all ready have. Marginally less grass to mow I guess. I flagged down our homes water shut off, so I hope they don’t hit that either.

I am mostly done with report #2 of (6) six, for this busy season, which ends in late September, possibly spilling into early October. Good to get the work in, and done before the weekend comes. I like to swim and hang out with my kids guilt free on weekends. God damn why can’t we get passed Covid, so many things I’d like to take my kids to, and to go experience together. Theme Parks, indoor go cart rides, movies, bowling, indoor rock climbing, a mall for an air conditioned stroll. Gah! So dull with those things stricken from the list of potential day trips and fun family time. Not that with this heat we’d ever turn down a swim, or a splash through the creek at the farm looking for fish, toads, minnows or crayfish. That’s always an adventure!

It was a busy week to ten days or so, four sell sheets, various print ads, one big report, five can labels (355ml & 473ml), icon illustrations and logo creation, and some compositing, as well as a 3D rendering for an updated product package. A solid ten days of heightened workload, followed by?… who knows what. Maybe some retail signage? New business development from another micro brewery? Packaging projects? Definitely more reports, that much I know for certain. Joy’s of freelancing I’m sure.

Plans in the rain.

You all know well enough that if I had of cancelled plans for yesterday evening, the clouds would have immediately parted and the sun shown through. But as it was it stayed blustery and tried to dribble on the walk down, but nothing much came of it. That was until around 9:45pm when it was time to walk home after a round of adult beverages (I’m a light weight, so no driving). And within a handful of steps the rains began to fall. It was more of a mild annoyance. The rain felt fine in the dark, but looked way worse in the light of the street lamps, or the cone of a head light. Then it looked pretty awful. My main concern was the flashing of lightning in the sky. But no rumbles, so I was confident it was all fairly far away. It rumble a good crack once or twice when I was within five hundred meters of home, so all together not awful. Could have been a whole lot worse. It wasn’t a completed downpour, and the lightning was far away. I could have called for a ride, but it wasn’t that bad. Plus it had been so hot and humid that the coolness of the rain on my shoulders was welcomed.

Now did any of it hit the farm? Given that it lasted roughly twenty minutes and was by my estimation blowing north east, I think it passed over the up and coming vegetable crops. So back we’ll go for our turn at watering. Nothing screams fun! Like lugging dirty hoses around the gardens.

Should I have been surprised to see so many restaurants in town that were packed to the gills last night? I visited a covered patio with a high ceiling, open all four sides, with only a few scattered guests. So I think I’m ok. I had my N95 on me, and kept my distance, but who knows if that’s enough with BA.5 at this point.

Waking up before your alarm goes off…

Ends in one of several ways. You’re either really rested and ready to get up and go (unlikely!) Or you feel groggy and then get the best six minutes of sleep you’ve ever had in your life (yeah baby!) Or it’s some kind of emergency and you get up in a panic, feel both awake and exhausted and then crumple into a heap once the shock of being awoken early has worn off.

We are heading off to harvest garlic under a stark and uncaring sun, in the sizzling morning heat. With any luck the rain we had recently will mean we don’t have to fight every single garlic clove coming up out of the ground. Given how sweaty and grumpy the first crew was about it yesterday evening, I think it’s going to be a bit of a slog to get through. Just a thought anyway. I give my kids about 30-45 seconds of work before they desire a swim, or just up and leave the garden we’ll be working in. This is when a big portable 10x10ft tent would come in handy. You could work under it out of the sun. The heat will still suck, but the full force of the baking sun would not be scorching my back the whole time. Things you realize far too late in the year!

So, the other day I milled up a couple of old reclaimed boards, and now I need to decide what to build with it all. It’s not much, so a book case or cabinet are out. I have enough for a box, or open vessel of some sort. Unless I tackle more of the reclaimed wood pile. I need to leave some in a rustic state to make a sign for my wife’s side of the family. Something that will go to their cottage at some point. Our living room desperately needs storage space. Like a big wall unit of asymmetrical shape, to fit the odd space, but gives us shelves, and drawers in which to place… stuff. Kids stuff mainly. Not that the 3ft x 2ft toy box I built helped all that much. You have to put your stuff BACK into the toy box for it to be a long term solution.